We started poorly. The owner I hoped to impress was very uncomfortable with our first trek. Many times between mile 0 and mile 6 my new owner endured hip, ankle and toe pain.
He laced both shoes tighter after the first 2 miles but never found a comfortable fit. i showed no signs of wear other than sole discoloration.
I hope day 2 is better.
I’m a shoe. More specifically I’m a New Balance 590 AT trail running shoe, but you can call me “N” for short. I’m here because my new owner has high expectations for me. My conception began in some factory probably located in the northeast United States, but a shoe’s life actually begins once purchased and worn. My owner purchased me to replace two failures. Those failures were two different pair of Saucony Cohesion 9 running shoes and both pair either deformed or disintegrated in two months time — much to my owner’s disappointment. A little research and $50 later I arrived with the promise of documented adventures.
- longevity: My lifetime longevity goal is 6 months or three times the period of the previous pair of shoes. Anything less than 6 months is a failure.
- durability: I will be durable and develop no holes, tears, deformation or significant component breakdown within the next 6 months from normal activity. Replacement should be based on sole wear not decomposition.
- comfort: I will be comfortable on all trail, street and indoor terrain without producing blisters, overheating or pinches.
- support: I will provide good overall foot support with no heel or arch breakdown.
My owner will take me to places I could never imagine. Of course, I’m a shoe so no one manufacturers or purchases me for an imagination. I aspire to serve my owner so he will enjoy my life, I will enhance his and he will purchase more shoes just like me in the future. Stay tuned for my “N” adventures
Have you ever counted the number of idioms people use in every day conversation? I’m guilty of dropping a few without thinking about it. Wag the Dog. A Leopard Can’t Change His Spots. All Bark and No Bite. Beat a Dead Horse. Bite Off More Than You Can Chew. Don’t Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth. Cry Wolf, Curiosity Killed the Cat. Why do people use idioms? Why do so many contain animal references? Do animals like being used in idioms? What happens when animals try to live them out? I guess pigs fly. Continue reading
Two Chicks is a collection of sober events and misrepresented tales as expressed through a satirist’s eyes.